Links to Joy

dsc00763I’ve been feeling a little under the weather.   Amazing how the body will survive even if it cannot thrive when stress levels reach dizzying heights. Even more remarkable is the way the body realizes that when the pressure eases she finally can take her chance to tune out and shut down.  Though I know I am blessed to have had the strength to ride through the competing stresses that have marked 2009 for me so far, it is still hard to get used to the full stop that a sore throat and aching head seem to demand.

Anyway!  My last post may have been a bit angsty, and in general the fall out from the past week have not made for the sweetest of epiphanies.  One antidote for all this processing?  Go see Brandi at was once called (and perhaps still is) Dandelion Seeds Studio.

Let her inspire you to become a Joy Rebel.  And don’t be afraid to join her shiny, new kind of army.  Through the fog of my mysterious run-down feeling malady I am having a little trouble with my joy rebel name

Hmm, just for a little while I will be Winter Phoenix (ever hopeful!) and my mantra… I am safe and loved.

4 thoughts on “Links to Joy

  1. Danny Lucas February 11, 2009 / 10:43 pm

    Winter Phoenix (ever hopeful)?
    Corporate Refuge ?
    Alignment woman ?
    Joy Rebel ?
    Penitant Halo Carrier ?
    Introspective Perspective Author ?
    Woman with madness in her eyes?
    Trying to Make Peace with the past?
    Resilient maker?

    My God, this is only part of 2009.
    Who is this woman and why does she love roadkill so much? 🙂

    Sometimes, glimpses to a soul slip by for only a moment, and only the observant catch the glimpse, for they were looking in anticipation and SAW it as it went by.

    Go see Dandelions. I went.
    I failed to read Joyful Rebel, but did scroll Tags and selected Church by Brandi. I always view comments first to see what an audience is hearing from a blogger.
    In all of these interconnected “Virtual Friends” that I read, Brandi gave a glimpse of Epiphany Girl soul in the post called “Church”.

    No need to ram a belief down anyone’s throat, Brandi began. Who among us has yet to be scar proof from attending a church?
    But Brandi saw it was the PEOPLE who hurt her, not the organization, or the beliefs.
    Real people hurt people and instill a lack of Trust, although I believe a prior divorce did a lot of that chinking into her truths and ability to trust.

    Trust is a derivative of Truth in American Sign Language….and life.

    YOU brought Brandi over here with what YOU see as central. Allow me to do the same.

    In “Church”, Brandi does more staying away than going over the years, for a hollowness exists after you leave that was present when you entered. Why bother after a while? (The story is bigger than that; read it yourself)

    But Brandi soon comes to this:

    “Then they brought out the children from children’s church and lined them up on the stage. Every person in the congregation held their hands out to the kids and as a body said, ‘we love you, we bless you and we truly appreciate you JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.’

    I started to cry.

    ~~~~~~~~~Brandi / Dandelion Girl

    My brain said “Where have I heard that before at Epiphany Girl spot?

    My brain said “Why do I hear that lament in all these women linked virtually, but separated physically, and isolated individually?”

    And then I remembered the glimpse into the soul a while back.

    I read and remembered this:

    “Usually it is my role to dole out the relationship maxims, but I know I am not the only source, especially when my love is the one to urge me to stop with all this talk of “work.”
    ~~~Girl Who Cried Epiphany

    “Let’s talk about nurturing each other,” he said.

    ~~~Man Who Watches Girl Cry Epiphany…..
    and the Litany of titles I posted above to name a few.

    But he is really proclaiming:
    “Skip the titles.
    Skip the searching.
    ‘I love you, I bless you and I truly appreciate you JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.’ ”

    Sometimes, guys need to hear that back as much as children need to hear it forward.

    It is February 11, 2009.
    I went to the cemetary today and stopped to see my twin sisters in rows 7 and 11. Then, across the street, to see mom and dad.
    They were married on February 11, 1939….60 years ago this day.

    My sisters were sick, 5 and 6 years respectively, from age 6 until death at 10 and 11. In those same years, mom and dad produced another 10 kids who still live.

    I stood at the grave matching the years, with what I know today, and what was going on in their lives over time.
    Dad died Father’s Day weekend in 1984 after 5 years of being sick. He was 66.
    Mom’s name was etched in stone by him in 1984.

    I had always sent them anniversary cards on February 11th. After dad died, anniversaries became more difficult to do alone. I sent cards each February 11th anyway.

    In the 24 years since dad died, mom told me “Of all my children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren, you are the ONLY one to send me an anniversary card every year since your father died”.

    Mom loved cards by Flavia (they are online, pricy and worth it).

    That they were Flavia made it better. I was the only one in the family she spoke of Flavia and why they were loved so much.

    Mom’s birthday is May 21st, 1921.
    In 2008, she visited a sister in Oregon and was due in PA (home) on May 20th for all my siblings to fly home and celebrate, plus the 99 grandchildren, and great grandchildren — since grown to 101. Mom had a stroke out in Portland on May 15th, 2008, but held on til mid-day of May 21, 2008 her 87th birthday. She never regained consciousness, but those gathered, sang “Happy Birthday” and the “Lord’s Prayer”, and mom bowed out….in the hour she bowed in.

    I wrote Flavia this week and told her what she meant to my mom. Mom knew depths of pain, hunger as a child, poverty. She spent her life elevating the worth of every person she met.
    I told Flavia that I had thought to run and buy a card for the 60th anniversary over last weekend, and with a jolt, recalled that mom is no longer here either. This is my first year sending no card.

    So, I told Flavia that since I could not address the card to heaven (don’t know the address, and Google ain’t telling), I wanted to order a final card from Flavia, not to celebrate anniversary number 60, but to celebrate anniversary number 1 together in heaven. You choose the appropriate, send it, and a bill. I’ll pay.

    When I came home, online Flavia had written back about what the email meant in reverse.
    Amber replied warmly that she is picking the perfect card, and it is coming to me at No Charge.
    I will keep it in my Bible til I join them both one day, along with pics I snapped at the cemetary today.

    Links to Joy are there to see, if you are looking already to see them.
    Titles and names are not needed. Just genuine you, and someone who accepts you as you are.

    Last, I met a beautiful young woman in a nearby cemetary row.
    We gab from time to time as she comes to visit. A coupla months after mom died, Keith died. He was in his 20’s. The woman lays on the ground talking to Keith, put balloons on his grave for his birthday last November, and seems to be there as often as I am.

    She and Keith were engaged and going to be married in 2009.
    There will never be an anniversary for them. If you are a praying person, I ask that you offer a prayer for this young woman.

    She needs a link to joy.
    For once in her life, someone loved her just the way she was. People bruise easily as Brandi can attest. But with your prayers and more, instead of wandering the universe asking “Why?”, perhaps another soul will come along and accept her just the way she is again.

  2. Danny Lucas February 11, 2009 / 11:05 pm

    My bad.
    “They were married on February 11, 1939….60 years ago this day.”


  3. brandi February 12, 2009 / 8:10 am

    ugh ugh on the sore throat!!!!

    I’m sorry you aren’t feeling well, sweetie. I know how painful those can be-it’s not like you can just stop swallowing right?

    maybe this calls for a joyful routine of naps. or ice cream. or hot showers.

    I hope you feel beter soon!!

    and thank you so very much for the link and mention of the joy rebel army!!! I’m always looking for new recruits 😉

    seriously though, I so appreciate the support and encouragment.

    many blessings to you my friend

  4. Lisa February 14, 2009 / 8:11 pm

    Haven’t even gotten to your links yet, but wanted to stop by and send you HUGS.
    My heartfelt and kindred spirit thoughts are with you these days. I *so* much appreciate your presence here ~ and amazingly relevant and touching comments on my blog.

    Based on your first paragraph, it sounds like we might be going through similar years thus far. Ugh.

    Hugs to you, dear one. Wishing you LOVE and LIGHT this day. 🙂

    p.s. You can never go wrong with a Thomas Moore recommendation!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s